If I’m President

Don’t worry, I’m not announcing my run for 2020 because I’m too poor for anyone to care but if I had the chance, I’d promise these things:

First off, I’d pursue something I call the “Ground Up” treatment where anyone who wants to be President, Senator or have any position in the Federal Government will have to go two months as the lowest tier of people before they claim the office. That way, they can see personally how it is to be in the shoes of the people that they tend to overlook. This will provide a job to makeup artists that can get the person dolled up to prevent any assassination attempts prior to getting in.

Secondly, I’d make Multi Level Marketing schemes illegal. They go after people that are kinda desperate for money and leech off of them. If you can’t pay people hourly, you’re not a job that’s hiring people, you’re a scam trying to live off of people who then is trying to live off people.

Third, Considering how screwed up the Economy is, we need more workers and through experience, I can say that I know what it’s like to be denied a job. So I can’t force the businesses to hire you but I will do my damnedest to make sure that if you don’t get the job, they’re at least required to tell you why in specific detail and every day they don’t, the people present at the interview will lose their hourly pay by a nickel a day, salary workers lose a hundred dollars a day. If they can’t give you a job, they don’t deserve to be given a buttload of money and you deserve to at least know exactly why you got denied.

Fourth, I’d make sure the banks can’t scam people anymore, the stuff banks have been doing to people ain’t right. They should be for the people, not the other way around, plain and simple. I’d make sure that they’re watched and hell, I’d even walk into some big time offices every now and again just to see how everything’s going.

Fifth, I’d do everything in my power to help out small businesses. The economy is only as good as the people who have the money and small businesses can help more people get jobs so that they can have money. Screw big business, the problem with them is that they have this sick obsession with making money at the expense of the regular people and that’s not even a pun. Big Business has always been evil and they don’t need any more babying by the Government, and I’d be the President that won’t baby them like everyone else do.

Sixth, I’d promote farming and gardening. It’s healthier, cleaner, more affordable and does the Earth and the community some good.

Now, I’m sure that peeps are looking at me like “well, what about International Affairs, Guns, Race problems and all that other shit?”…Well, it’s simple.

I’m not gonna be President so why should those things matter to me anyway?


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